Monday, November 5, 2007

Weekly Schedule

It is amazing how a simple trip to the hospital can halt labor. I think any L&D nurse out there would agree that it is amazing how many women that are having contractions that are 2-3 minutes apart at home and in the car suddenly slow down to every 10-15 minutes or stop contracting all together once they get to the hospital. I have noticed that once we get a story out of them, the reason for the "labor check" seems to run on the following schedule:

Sunday- Their significant other has been watching football (or another sport) all weekend and they are severely lacking attention. A trip to the hospital can fix this.

Monday- Isn't it obvious? Someone had already resigned to the fact that she couldn't face another work week.

Tuesday- Leftovers from Monday who made it in that one day and couldn't go on.

Wednesday- These are the girls that were checked in the office Monday or Tuesday. Even though they were told some spotting is normal after a cervical exam they are pretty sure the world is coming to an end.

Thursday- It's poker night. Enough said.

Friday- Similar to Thursday. The significant other is on their way out of town for their last weekend out with the guys and she needs to find a way to get him to stay home. These girls are usually not even term but they will give it a good shot anyway.

Saturday- The whole family came into town because she was due that week and they need to see a baby before they leave damn it.

Scattered in this are the women who have previously delivered a pre-term baby. Once they reach that magic number of weeks they delivered at before they decide they are done being pregnant and start showing up frequently thinking they are in labor.


ktdid said...

OMG! The schedule is universal! This totally cracks me up- especially the football/sports visits! Or on Saturday when hubby has gone to the bar, has been called by wife saying she's in labor, he comes in drunk, etc.
Love it!

l&d.rn said...

Now that I think about it, I think this post comes full circle with post about guys that show up wearing their favorite stip club T-shirts.

Juliana said...

I think that every woman who comes in on a Monday should be induced out of pity. Have some sympathy!!

AtYourCervix said...

Very funny observations L&D RN! Don't forget also, the ones who show up on their due date - after all, they're due that day, so they must be in labor!!

Flann said...

I'll teach him to go out with his friends! I'll go into labor and have to be rushed to the hospital! Then he'll never, ever leave me!

Bettsi McComb said...

Ha! I was the opposite! I would be in good labor every morning for about three days, but each time my three year old daughter would wake up and the labor would stop!